Awareness on Day 19

I was at my rehearsal this evening in London.  This involves my walking for about 20 minutes through bar-strewn streets, and tonight I observed how many people were drinking.  I couldn’t spot one single person drinking an alcohol-free drink, or at least that is how it seemed.  Everyone had a beer, or wine, or cocktail, and everyone looked happy and convivial… As I walked past, I felt left out, and started to worry about how I was going to cope with the whole social thing, because drinking alcohol just is a social thing to do.

A few hours later, I walked back to the station, passing the same bars.  The scene was very different.  Various people were sitting on the pavement, drinking and smoking, and it all seemed quite sordid.  I felt much better about what I was doing, and came home relieved that I was on this path.

This comes after last night’s weird dream in which I drank 3 little medecine cupfuls of red wine.  In my dream, I remember thinking that this was allowed because it was ‘medecine’.  Hmmmm… I am clearly entering dangerous territory with my husband away, and the temptation to drink hovering over me.

But thank you so much to everyone who commented on yesterday’s post, with so many wonderful ideas of how to combat these unhealthy cravings.  I am planning to arm myself with various tools over the next few days:  nice treat-y food, films, hot baths, activities with the kids…and hope that I can fend off the call of the bottle.

5 thoughts on “Awareness on Day 19”

  1. Hi Annie, I’m on day 16 and have been experiencing a few cravings myself. I’ve been reading a lot of sober blogs and have been eating a lot of chocolate. Not the best strategy with the chocolate, but at least I’m sober. Glad you are taking care of yourself. Hang in there.

  2. this blog is wonderful. I am 5 days in and finding it difficult at times as well. I woke up this morning feeling good and positive which lasted all day. now having anxiety about what happens when the initial euphoria wears off….. trying to keep busy. going to bed early too!

  3. refer my Day 25, “measuring in weeks …..almost” weird, I dreamt about it too. must be a stage. hang in there, it gets easier, sort of….

  4. Is it an orchestra or a choir you are rehearsing with? That is a social thing you are doing! There are lots of ways to be social and most of them do not involve the pub. Glad that it all looked so different on the way back – such a good illustration of the illusion of “social drinking” and how different an evening looks at the end compared to the beginning. Not always a disaster, but certainly a lot less glamorous! You’re doing great 🙂 xx

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