Saturday morning

Only 9.30am but I thought I’d write early today to let you know how I got on last night at the drinks party. As I drove to the event, I tried to imagine myself drinking a glass of prosecco; I even wondered if I could sneak in a glass before my husband arrived at the party as he was coming straight from work and would be arriving separately. See that word ‘sneak’? All at once, I realised that I was beginning to hide what I wanted to do about my drinking, and as I walked into the party, I had a moment of clarity and knew that I wasn’t going to drink. I went over to the makeshift bar and picked up a glass of elderflower, and that was that. No prosecco, no desire for prosecco. I chatted to various people and when my husband eventually arrived, he had a beer and shortly after we went home.

The other plan which I’d been brewing in my mind all day was that post-drinks party I was going to celebrate my sobriety by opening a nice bottle of wine. It’s time to stop all this sober stuff, I thought, and go back to normal. But when we got home, this suddenly seemed like the worst plan ever. We didn’t open the wine. We drank some AF fizzy stuff instead, had supper, and watched a film.

I didn’t want to drink. And I didn’t drink. And here I am on Saturday morning, Day 35, and with an unexpected determination to continue on my sober way, even though I spent so much time yesterday planning its destruction. Dinner party tonight seems less of a hurdle than before, as though I’ve mentally shifted into a new place. Don’t want to sound complacent, and 9.30am thinking is always very different from 5pm thinking, but I do feel different today.

14 thoughts on “Saturday morning”

  1. Wonderful!!! 715 am here in rainy New York….on the way to hot yoga UNHUNGOVERπŸŽ‰. You said it, 930 am thinking is different from 530 pm thinking. (Husband has the jimmy buffet channel on the radio and the song playing? ” Why don’t we get drunk and screw ” it’s too early for this!!! πŸ˜‹πŸ˜˜)

  2. Wonderful job! You analyzed your feelings, dealt with them rationally, and made the best decision for you. Those are behaviors that you will be able to use over and over whenever you are tempted to do something you know, in your heart, is not good for you. Sounds like you have turned a very important corner. Stay strong!

  3. Woo hoo!!! A mental shit is right! You did it! You must be feeling soooo good right now. That feeling is something that will carry you though tonight. I’m really liking that you couldn’t wait to let all your supporters know of your victory and your mind set now. You’re doing the right thing for all of us out here! Day 28 for me and you just made my day! πŸ’—

  4. You go, Annie! Gah, I’m only on day 6 and that kind of thinking is really starting to bend my nerves. Tonight, my friends are coming over to watch movies. One is pregnant, the other doesn’t drink, and one is stopping like me. I’m going to make chili, brownies, hot cider… It should be fun and relaxing for a cold day like today. It’s only 50 degrees Fahrenheit… It was 90 two days ago! Thank you for stopping by my blog, Annie. It means a lot to me!

  5. That was fabulous. Isn’t it interesting that once you let the “glory” of the drink to than the af choice is adequate. That you can still enjoy the night. That you and your husband could share a nice Friday night at home.
    Celebrating your sobriety with booze just sounds wrong some how…

    Enjoy your dinner party. Think of how good you felt last night and this morning. Hold that pride tight!

    Have a wonderful Saturday.

  6. Just stumbled upon your blog! Really enjoying reading all your posts keep them coming well done on 30days!!! I have just hit 20 days myself ! Haven’t really told anyone about my sobriety not ready ! feeling good but anxious about upcoming parties and the whole “forever” thing! Hope you continue on your journey ! Xx

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