New Year’s Eve fear

Tonight we have a few friends here for New Year’s Eve. I feel calm and ready, but it is only 12.20pm and the fridge is stuffed full of alcohol. But I have also stocked up on AF alternatives, particularly as there will be children here (as well as my own children).

I know I need to do this. The last few weeks have been fuzzy round the edges. Lots of fun here and there, and good cheer generally, but I felt weary in the middle of it all, and knew that my drinking was sneaking back into my daily life. That’s the problem. My husband claims that our no drinking Mon-Thurs was working, but I knew that the Friday/Sat/Sunday drinking was out of control. By December the 1st I slid into full party mode and am only now emerging.

Went to a drinks party and was drunk in 45 minutes, saying mean things about a friend of mine; stopped going up to say goodnight to the children, preferring to stay downstairs to get a few extra glasses of wine in me; stayed up until the small hours watching terrible television and raiding the drinks cupboard for old Baileys.  Old Baileys ! So classy! Old, old habits, all flooding back within a few weeks.

While walking the dog a few days ago, I found myself making New Year plans: don’t drink in the week, eat healthily, only drink 2 glasses a night… Well, forget these plans, I won’t be able to sustain them. The best plan – and I know it’s tough – is to STOP DRINKING.

Day 2 underway.

15 thoughts on “New Year’s Eve fear”

  1. Good luck. I relate exactly. I’ve still got people nagging me to drink tonight (I’m pleased that they don’t think I have a problem! ) but I’m done . Got my Pellegrino and lots of petrol invite car for all the lifts I’ll offer lately. I am rooting for you 🙂

  2. Hi Annie! It is still morning this New Year’s Eve, but my plan is to stay sober tonight and continue on. I drank so much over Christmas that I had stomach problems too. I have been sober for 4 days now and alreay feeling so much better. I was not able to maintain moderation at all. It is just too hard once the booze gets under your skin! Good luck with your party. Sounds like you are in a good frame of mind. I’ll check your blog agin tomorrow. Happy New Year!

  3. Happy day two and 2015. If you want it you can do it. Say no to that drink. There are a bunch of us sober people on NYE. Think of us!!!

  4. Hi Annie, Happy New Year. Just read your post and wondering how the night is going. I am right there with you on all the fits and starts and I so relate to everything you’ve said. Thank you for your honesty and inspiration. I hope we can do this together!!

  5. Here I sit on New Year’s Eve. The bloody Mary’s are starting. Beers are opened. I’m a little envious. But I will awaken tomorrow feeling good. And you will too! Happy sober New Year!

  6. Happy to read this post and congrats on day 2!!! One day at time! I tried the M-Th no booze rule too. I made up for it on the weekends. 2015 is your year, and we are all here for you!!!

  7. Welcome back. Sometimes we need an outside force to push us along the road in recovery. Maybe your stomach complaint will be a good thing. I wish you lots of luck and warmest wishes for this year and hope you find the strength to make it. I had several attempts and always ended up drinking more than I had before. I’m now four months in and although it is tough at times, I’m starting to see real progress in how I think and feel. Please keep working at it every day if you can.

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