In my past sober attempts, I concentrated on not drinking. That was hard enough; but it wasn’t enough. This time, I am trying to look more carefully at my motivations for drinking, to examine why not drinking can make me feel so blue. So when a craving strikes, as it does every day from about 4.30pm, rather than chop supper ingredients recklessly and curse, I take a moment to think about what exactly it is that I am craving. Is it the wine, or is it the glass? One of my blogging friends described herself as always needing some sort of drink in her hand, and I really get that. This is why I have found my mocktail ritual so effective in the past few days: replacing the alcohol with an innocent fizz is obviously crucial, but it’s the GLASS that matters.
I can feel the novelty of my sober planning wearing off. Rather than settling nicely into my sober rituals and getting used to a new normal, I am starting to feel tired of it. Yesterday evening I did not have a bath (gasp!), nor did I make my beloved mocktail (double gasp!). Instead, I grabbed an AF beer (the last one in the world as Dry January has emptied the supermarket shelves of these little babies), glugged it as though it were real beer, and felt fed up. Note to self: do not abandon the bath/mocktail moment. This is important.
A Dappled Path 
Fighting against change doesn’t make it any easier. It is sirt if lije beating our fists against the wind.
Just try to find things you enjoy and don’t drink.
Anne
I think I’m an expert at fighting against change. I need to work on that. Thanks, Anne. Annie x
Wayne dyer recommebded a book called letting go.
It’s only $1.99 on kindle
I downloaded it as it sounds helpful
Might help.
The hard thing about fighting a change we need to make is the longer we wait, the more likely it is that the change is made for us.
The thought of potential drinking repercussions helped keep me on the sober path at the beginning.
I didnt want to end up in jail, the hospital etc.
Hugs
Stick with it. Fight for you.
The cravings I experienced during the “witching hour” went away after about three months. It felt magical when it finally happened because I had felt like I was missing something during that time for so long- whether alcohol or a mocktail or whatever. Keep going and that will happen for you, too. I know it seems like a long time, but do whatever you can to get through until then! Your bath and mocktail routine sounds good! xo
Thank you. I am certainly bang in the middle of cravings at the moment. And the thought of our visitors arriving tomorrow is really worrying me. Annie x
You sound so much better this time around! Really thinking things through. You’re going to make!
Mary. 💗💗
I hope so. I still can’t believe that I’ll ever get past those first few weeks 😔 But I am very grateful for your support, Mary. Annie x
Here’s an article you may find interesting, about examining the reasons why not drinking makes you ‘feel so blue,’ as you said.
http://tinybuddha.com/blog/overcoming-painful-desires-beliefs-that-feed-addiction/
Glad to hear you’re going strong. Keep it up!
Thanks for this link; I found the article really interesting, and helpful. Annie x
Hang in there Annie, I’m feeling exactly the same. I sat last night and thought why do I feel this way? I concluded that I am not relaxing in the way that I used to. Watching tv, I feel guilty for sitting down because somehow relaxing when I don’t have a drink is wrong. How stupid am I to think that! So I wondered how to fix it, perhaps if I do something while I’m watching tv I’ll enjoy it more… manicure perhaps. I think at this stage, I’m finding it harder to remember why it is better. But I know it is better to be sober 🙂
And I think my “wolfie” is telling me (or trying to) that I always fail here so why not this time! I WILL NOT listen to him this time… he sucks!
Keep tough and look forward to another hangover free morning 🙂
One of my problems is that I keep thinking I’m going to fail. Thanks for your comment, and thanks for being here with me. Annie x
Thanks for being here with me too 🙂 we can do this. I have been feeling exactly the same. Makes me feel quite alone when my partner sits drinking so it’s good to know we are all here on our blogs supporting each other 🙂 x
Annie we are on the same page, I feel really low and bit bleurgh. Need to shake myself up a bit. I’m dreading the weekend, I feel like drinking now and it’s only Thursday. Think I shall hole myself up, keep on my pj’s all weekend (not the same ones obvs!) and hunker down at home and weather the storm.
Always here for you x
I’m so glad you’re here. I am also dreading the weekend. I love the people who are coming to stay and am going to find it really hard with all the drinking. I’m going to try and stay really connected to the blog. I feel very low and needy! Oh dear. Annie x
Big strong Amazonian hugs to you, Warrior Annie xxx
I like the Warrior idea, though I don’t feel very strong at the moment 😔. But thank you, lovely Bea. Annie x
Just keep doing what you’re doing. And keep blogging!
I will certainly try! I know you’re there with me. Annie x
HI Annie – it IS a bit rocky isn’t it? I have had a crazy couple of days with this biz trip and everyone else guzzling like it’s their job, then crazy travel stress and wolfie is telling me wine on the plane would be Just Perfect. I told that miserable bastard to STFU though, and every time I do that I feel a bit stronger and more positive. I think keeping the mocktail routine in place (bitter stuff – tonic, grapefruit, stuff like that) is helppful. As soon as this plane takes off, I am getting a double tonic with extra lime and toasting my day 6 and your day ?12?? But I am toasting us!! Hang in there. We can (CAN) do this, and a bit of the blues or frazzle isn’t worth derailing it.
Hugs,
SR
You are so right. I do worry about derailing, as I have derailed many times before. Thanks for being here. Annie x
I so understand you. I am on day 25 and it is hard. I know the triggers to my cravings during the week. And weekends. I am struggling my way though it all. You are right, thinking about the reasons instead just simply focusing on wants might help.
Hi Anna. 25 days is brilliant – it still seems a long way off for me! I hope you’re ok. Thanks for commenting. Annie x