It’s been a long time since I have written here. And it’s been a long time since I had a stretch of more than one or two sober days. For a while, I went to meetings, and I found them helpful. But I am still stuck in a cycle of stop/start; good intentions on waking, swiftly followed by a dulling of those intentions and a resolve to begin again tomorrow.
But I don’t want to be this person, this drinking person, this person who goes to bed every night sad inside.
In recent weeks, I haven’t even been able to have one sober day. I have contemplated many times retrying the 100 day challenge, but it seems impossible for me at the moment. Back in September last year, a kind friend suggested I try not drinking for 30 days and that’s when I started this blog. I broke the habit, I felt better, kick-starting a more positive attitude to sobriety. And so I am going to try a 30 day challenge again, my own challenge, writing here every day to record how I am getting on.
I have not forgotten the sober blogging world, and have still been reading several blogs a week, commenting here and there. But I’ve been hiding.