Default setting

It is amazing how many times in the last hour or so that my mind has turned to drinking: shall I drink? Shall I give up my challenge? Shall I have one, then start my challenge again tomorrow? I am feeling tired, and overwrought, and my default setting is to drink.

So instead, I am writing here. Then I am going to make supper. I am going to push through and make it to tomorrow sober. Once I’ve had supper, I will try and get through each quarter of an hour until bedtime, not drinking.

It sounds crazy, doesn’t it, being so consumed by it. But from past experience, I know these cravings will pass.

For today, I can’t do more than these 15 minute sections, as day 3 draws to a close.

20 thoughts on “Default setting”

  1. Take it one minute at a time if that’s what it takes.
    It doesn’t sound crazy. It sounds like compulsive behaviour. I know it is brutal. And it will pass, but that’s so hard to believe some times.
    Do whatever it takes to not drink. Go to bed. Bath. Whatever.

  2. Hope you get thru ok. it can’t be easy but you can do it. Adjustment is hard but you can do it, just get thru today and see how you are tomor X

  3. Do whatever it takes Annie. If you have to do 15 minutes at a time then so be it. Just get through the day. You can do this. We are all here for you. A x

  4. Annie, it’s so good to see you writing again. Ever since your blog went private for a time, I’ve been keeping my fingers crossed for you. Welcome back!

  5. Visit a chat sobriety website called Living Sober, it is very distracting! The hours flew by in my early sobriety days whilst chatting to peeps on there. I also found listening to The Bubble Hour’s podcasts daily, on hard days twice daily, helped hugely! The 3 D’s – Distract, Delay and Drink (water)!

    1. Good advice! I listen to the Bubble Hour every day at the moment. I haven’t started the sober counter on Living Sober again yet, because I’m scared of failing. Annie x

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