Friday Friday Friday

I usually love Fridays. That Friday feeling…well, at the moment, I’m finding it hard. It’s so engrained in me to wind down, relax, celebrate the approaching weekend, with a drink in hand. This is especially the case when my husband and I try to stick to the no drinking in the week rule, so usually when Friday comes round, the temptation is to drink more than ever – another reason why not drinking in the week never works for me.

I’m on Day 12, and today feels difficult. I have continued to cancel and rebook my counselling appointment – it’s supposed to be on Monday, and at the moment the appointment IS in place. I am hopeful that the counsellor is used to people changing their mind about coming, and won’t think I’m mad. I went to a meeting earlier this afternoon. I didn’t want to go, and when I got stuck in traffic en route, I nearly turned round to drive home. I thought of 25 different reasons why I shouldn’t go/didn’t need to go, but I knew they were all rubbish, so I carried on, and I was bang on time.

I haven’t been to many meetings so far, partly because afterwards I often feel triggered – I think because I don’t like the idea of being in the same situation (different stories apart) as the people I meet there. But today, I came home afterwards, and knew that I didn’t want to relapse into the same tired wheel of drinking because it’s Friday, followed by a sluggish Saturday and a Sunday wishing I hadn’t succumbed and all that resolution stuff.

It is not easy. People say I need to put one step in front of the other, and I think that’s very helpful advice. One step in front of the other, one step in front of the other, hour by hour.

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3 thoughts on “Friday Friday Friday”

  1. It’s not easy to think we have ended up addicted or abusing alcohol. But it is the truth.
    It’s ok to recognize that your fear has you trying to make yourself seem different than those at AA. But, the truth is, we are all just trying to find some peace Nd joy in this life.

    Day 12 is great. Wine will not relax you or make this weekend more fun. It will make next week horrible and hard.

    Stick with your sober momentum. Give yourself a chance.

    Go to the appointment on Monday.

    Post of you need support!

  2. Annie, here and happy for you even in the muck. Day 12 is wonderful. I’ve found weekends are More in sobriety because drinking always sucked all my time from me (without me realizing it). So enjoy your weekend – even if it means you just use it to sleep and rest and comfort yourself.

  3. Fridays were hard for me for a long time. How was I supposed to celebrate the end of the week if I didn’t drink? Celebrations are still hard for me, I’ve yet to find the adequate replacement for alcohol on special occasions. But, Friday is just one day and celebrations are few, if I could have kept my drinking to those occasions, I would have been fine, but I couldn’t. I’m not going to sacrifice all of my other days for them.

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