I made it through my son’s party. That sounds ridiculous now I write it, but I hope you know what I mean. When my parents arrived in the evening, they and my husband had prosecco, and I had an AF alternative. It wasn’t ideal, as I think it’s really too close to the alcohol experience for me, and there was a slight muddle with the glasses (though I didn’t sip the wrong one) AND I haven’t yet had a conversation with my parents about what I’m doing. But apart from that, it went well, and I didn’t drink. So now I’m on Day 5.
A slight weariness has descended upon me today. By weariness, I mean a kind of depression. I know the perils of romancing the drink, but I’m finding the Christmas bloody spirit taunting me from many angles. But my husband is helping. The case of wine he is usually given from clients is going to be used as presents for friends; he is anticipating the boozy office lunch which I always go to by phoning the restaurant in advance and discussing a really good alcohol-free alternative drink, ie. not orange juice.
In last week’s episode of The Bubble Hour, Amanda was describing the image of a backlit bar, with glistening drinks, and how different this idea of drinking is compared with the reality. When I was on holiday a few weeks ago, I walked past just such a bar every evening, and the idea of it stuck in my mind like a dead weight. I’m still finding these sorts of images difficult to manage.
So, weary, and a bit down, but glad to be on Day 5.