This morning, a sober friend texted me healing vibes ‘on this crisp March morning’. Thank you for your healing comments yesterday; they really do help me. The warmth of support boosts me, and helps keep me going through these early days. Last night, I felt no craving to drink, just a weariness that I was trying again and that I had failed so many times. But I poured the lemonade and drank it gratefully – I don’t remember alcohol ever quenching my thirst in that way. During the past week or so of my drinking, as I prepared to stop, I tried really to feel and taste the drink for what it was: often sour, bitter and just not at all delicious.
Another sober friend has advised me to stay in the moment, as I have been somewhat manic lately: regretting the past drinking patterns, and agonising over how it will all be in the future. A colleague at work said that he was looking forward to hearing me tell jokes after a few cocktails at a party in the summer, and I started worrying about it right then. No need. Today is what matters, getting through today without drinking, and feeling better for it.
Meanwhile, my husband is keen for me to do yoga. I have never tried it, and think I’ll find it too difficult to concentrate, that my mind will wander, let alone the physical difficulties (he described shaking in his first session). I don’t want to take on too much: what I’m doing at the moment is enough. Onwards with day 2.
14 thoughts on “Healing vibes”
What you’re doing now is more than enough. The only “new” thing to add is meetings. And hiding out in bed as much as possible
I haven’t been to a meeting yet (this time round). But I have been going to bed early. Annie x
Agreed! One day at a time and get to a meeting. It just makes things so much easier. On yoga, I’ve learned to love it BUT I made the mistake of starting with a class (appropriate for all levels) and looked and felt the right fool (besides almost breaking my leg). Then I found this ap (for IOS, not sure if it is other places) — Yoga Studio. Really simple instruction on basic moves with a choice of progressive classes or putting your own workout together. I like being able to learn in the privacy of my own home and am much more likely to do a short session if I don’t have to show up for a class. Also I found learning meditation really helpful early on — there are tons of online resources that offer guided mindfulness meditations, start small. But I found it really helped get through the afternoon cravings. For a good while, I would meditate for twenty minutes at just the time I used to pour that first glass of wine. Now I have an active practice, and I don’t know how I lived without it before.
But all that said, it’s just IF YOU FEEL LIKE IT. Right now, as you said, not drinking in the moment is your biggest and really only task. Anything, including ice cream and naps and crap romance novels, is fair game if it gets you another sober day. Well done on getting to DAY 2!
Oh, I LOVE Yoga Studio. Seriously, Annie, try it.
Right? The instructors are so calm and explain everything so well, and the beginner poses really are for beginners.
I’d like to! Annie x
I’ve just looked up Yoga Studio – it looks good! Think I will download the app (once I work out how to do that). Mindfulness and meditation are also things I’ll consider, though I balk at that sort of thing usually. Thanks for all your helpful advice. Annie x
Yes, one thing at a time, one day at a time. Even one moment at a time. I remember this way of living really helped me during my long sober stretch and I’m trying it again now. Hugs 🙂
I’ve just posted a comment on your blog. Annie x
Right on Annie. That’s it. Don’t worry about the future or the past. Take it one moment at a time. Do try a gentle yoga class- perhaps a restorative class. Those are nice and relaxing! Best wishes.
Thank you. How are you? I peek at your blog, but it’s been quiet for a while. Annie x
Hi Annie! I’m good actually. I know I’ve been quiet for a while. But I have 30 days today actually! One month. Feels good. I haven’t written because I’ve been really busy and also just waiting to build up some momentum this time. I hope to do a post in the next week or so. Sending love to you xo
Yoga is supposed to be wonderful. I’ve been wanting to try it for a while now. Unfortunately, I have a sore hip so don’t think I could do it at the moment but I’m hoping one day. Maybe just concentrate on just not drinking at the moment. Yoga is something you might consider a bit down the track when you have settled into recover a bit. Congrats on day 2! A x
Yes, I’m considering the yoga, but right now I’m concentrating on NOT DRINKING. Thanks, Angie, my friend. Annie x