The demon drink

Things haven’t been going well here. But I wanted to let you know that I’m still trying, the counsellor is still booked – he must think me mad, all the cancelling and rebooking I do, but I imagine he’s used to this sort of behaviour – and I am ready to tackle today. Yes, just today – any further ahead, and my addict voice takes over.

The guilt and shame take up much of my time; and the feeling that I circle day one after day one with little to no progress. But the counsellor says it’s a process, so I’m clinging onto that.

 

9 thoughts on “The demon drink”

  1. Morning Annie! Your councillor is right – it IS a process. You’re trying and you must keep trying your very best. And no matter what, keep your appointments with the counsellor. Perhaps you need his support and the insights you gain for some time before you can stay sober. Perhaps you will in the end, need further intensive support. Whatever it takes.Hopefully today will be a good day! Sending you love. XXXX

  2. Hey Aim here, that you’re still willing to say day 1, regardless of set backs, is brilliant!! I’m also majorly struggling to pass day 1! But I believe we can n will get there!!

  3. Repeatedly trying to quit, then failing, is about the most common struggle that we’ve all have among us. And it okay…you’re among friends who’ve been in the same place…alcohol can be pretty wicked and addictive. Keep trudging forward. There are many recovery resources available to you and I encourage you to use them all…just don’t drink, and work toward healing. If something doesn’t work, then look for something else that does (ie counseling, therapy, AA, other groups, online groups, church, yoga, exercise, blogs, reading about addiction, etc.) This is hard. You can do it. You deserve freedom from this trap. I’m rooting for you!

    Jenn

  4. Good luck Annie! You sound determined this time, this is it, just think about not drinking today. They may invent a cure for alcoholism tomorrow! until then, just think about not drinking today.

  5. I think it’s like learning to walk as a baby. It takes a lot of trying and falling down and starting over. There is on guilt in not walking on the first try. Nobody does. Hang in there and you’ll be running before you know it. ; )

  6. I had many practice Day 1 attempts too! And on my last one, I took it hour by hour. No way could I see further than that! Keep it real, and do it for yourself. You will feel amazing!

  7. Annie, I am wishing you success for today! I too am struggling to string together sober days, but feel determined that it will happen for us both. Let us know how the therapist goes and keep trying. I think we only fail when we stop trying, no matter how many times we have to start again. Hugs to you today, take it easy and take care of your self!

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s