Thank you for all your comments yesterday. I understand that some of you are frustrated with me, and I am sorry about that. I do not always write about every method I am trying to help me get sober: the AA meetings, the counsellor, the email correspondences, the phone calls…as I delve deeper into why I drink and how I can stop, the personal investigations get harder to describe, and though I try and be honest here, I cannot reveal all. The nutrition route is only one of several tools I am using.
Ah, the blog! I have such mixed feelings about it! It can make me feel exposed and protected at the same time. Sometimes, people’s comments make me cry. This is not a bad thing, but it is a bit like being told off – it is never easy to accept and face it. I don’t feel that people who comment here are enablers; and I see the tough love comments as coming from a place where people care about me and want me to succeed. But they are still hard to read, and I went to bed last night feeling battered. It’s my own fault – I know I appear to have made no progress, but I never started this blog to create a perfect journey story, but rather to record the path, and try to find my way.
I read many sober blogs. I find both long term sobriety stories and early days ones equally helpful and inspiring.
I think what I’m trying to say is: I will keep trying, I will keep writing, I will keep reading. And I thank you all for being here, and for reading what I write, and for taking time to comment; every single person who reads and writes here helps me.