Things have felt a bit easier today. Indeed, I feel as though I’m getting in the groove a little. It is now more normal to come home and make myself an alcohol-free drink in the evening – I always have one – and then I read, or practise the piano, or do this and that round the house so as not to dwell. Once I’m cooking supper, I think I am past the craving and the rest of the evening is ok.
I am watching terrible films (eg. sharks/survival) and I have not been able to sleep well. Last night, I thought the house was on fire – I was convinced I could see and smell smoke, and I saw flashing lights. I would say my sleep has got worse over the past few days.
On my way to my orchestra rehearsal now, and the man opposite me on the train has a large pint of beer in a plastic cup. I would not want to be drinking this – a good sign? Day 11 today.