I’ve been spending a lot of time today reading and commenting on sober blogs. I’ve been trying to make this part of my sober work each day, as I think that’s what I need to be doing at the moment. I do worry that I’m spending too much time doing this, and other jobs are being neglected, but I also recognize that if I’m managing to get through each day without drinking, then my homework is being effective.
But when I find that someone hasn’t posted for several days or weeks, or even – as I discovered today – a whole blog appears to have been deleted, then I panic. Where are they? What has happened? I find that it worries me. I realise that I won’t always post every day (after my 30 days, I think I will post slightly less often), but I have this horrible thought that one day I will delete my blog, that I will go back to drinking and not tell anyone and the blog will no longer work. These thoughts are exacerbated by my dream last night in which – and I kid you not – I sipped steadily a whole bottle of brandy. Brandy! And Christopher Reeve of Superman fame came back to life and helped me drink it. Now what is THAT all about???
I am so immersed in my attempts to stay sober that I think I’m going slightly mad.
12 thoughts on “Sober work on Day 24”
HA HA. Your dream is funny. I was dabbling in brandy before my most recent sobriety (all 4ish days of it). Brandy is distilled wine. Yeck. Anyways, you’re totally helping me with my sober deal, man. Thank YOU for doing your sober homework.
I’m glad if I’m helping at all. Sometimes I feel as though I’m going mad writing the blog every day, and spending so much time thinking about it. But I’m convinced it’s helping me. Well done on your 4-ish days – every day is a triumph, I think! Annie x
All dreams are weird, it’s just that drinking dreams freak you out more! You are definitely not going mad, and I think spending time immersing yourself in the sobersphere is no bad thing at this stage. You’re doing so well 🙂 xx
Thanks, MTM. You’re such a support to me. I never quite know what triggers those drinking dreams. They don’t happen every night, but probably about once a week. I wake up wondering if I’ve actually been drinking. Annie x
I have had a few “drinking dreams” and I am so relieved after that few minutes of wakefulness and confusion when I realize it was just a dream! It is very surreal waking after one of these dreams. On your other topic, I think the time and effort you are putting into these 30 Days (homework and blogging) is well worth it because it is working! And you are really good at this! Your writing is so honest, open, thought-provoking, and interesting. I hope you continue even if not daily. Also, I hope my lack of blogging does not worry you 🙂 I am still here and would definitely reach out to you and this community if I needed help. I decided to set a goal to blog about 2-3 times a month, as writing can be really exhausting for me, but I do write a few sentences every day as part of my gratitude group and that has been really helpful! I am so proud of and impressed by your work my friend!
Thank you, lovely friend. And I know I can email you if I want to contact you outside the blog, so that helps too. I can appreciate that not everyone wants to write every day; it is helping me but it’s quite exhausting somehow! Annie x
Being slightly mad is probably a good thing!
Yeah, I find that when bloggers suddenly stop blogging, or delete their blogs, I am sad. I worried a bit that this wasn’t good for me. But I know everyone is on a different journey and right now part of what makes me happy is to encourage people so they may one day realize the huge joy sobriety brings.
You do encourage people, and you’re great! I have found your advice to be extremely helpful. Thank you. Annie x
Hello again Annie. Day 24! This is GREAT! Time management is not in my skill-set(!), so I geuninely don’t feel able to advise on how long to spend in the sobersphere BUT if it’s helping and supporting you, that’s good – and I’m v glad you’re here! xx
And I’m glad YOU’RE here! The friends I’ve made during this process are part of what’s keeping me going. Annie x
I’d have to agree with many above. If it’s working, then that’s what matters! Congrats on Day 24! I haven’t posted in a while because I’ve been busy – with life! And it’s awesome. I think I accomplished more in the past 24 hours than I would have in a week pre-sobriety. I’ve found myself saying yes to things I didn’t use (good stuff, work stuff, etc.) and being more sociable actually. Your blog is one of a few I check in with and it’s been a HUGE help! So thank you so much. Do what you need to do for you and keep up the great and inspiring work (as time, your schedule, interest and willingness allow).
Thanks so much for the positive vibes. I need them! Annie x